"Parking Tickets"
GUY
I got tired of getting parking tickets next to my own house.
GUY
So I figured out a nice loophole in the system.
GIRL
Oh?
GUY
In order to give you a ticket, they must first determine that your car hasn't moved.
GUY
To accomplish this, the parking attendant marks your tire and the road with a piece of chalk, then checks back the next day.
GUY
If the marks line up, then you get a ticket.
GIRL
So... you move your car once a day?
GUY
Of course not. That's what they want you to do.
GIRL
You hired a dog to pee on your tire once a day?
GUY
That's absurd. I would have to feed the dog.
GUY
Or at least give it water.
GUY
My solution is far more elegant.
EXT. CAR PARKED ON STREET
PARKING LADY walks toward car with peice of chalk in hand.
GUY (narrating)
First, I wait for the parking lady to go for her mark.
GUY (narrating)
Then, I leap from behind my car and beat her with a bag of oranges.
GUY whacks PARKING LADY in the head with bag of oranges.
A little extra work. A lotta extra fun. (Btw, if I didn't have a ton of work to do, the bonus frame would have been an animation of Parking Lady getting beaten down orange-style.)
I would've used the same kind and color chalk she used and then I wash away the old mark before using mine to mark another place farther away or closer to the tire.