"We Probably Can't All Just Get Along" TECH DUDE I have a proposal for merging science and religion. CHRISTIAN GIRL I think mixing science and religion is a bad idea. TECH DUDE So, you won't mind if I do some stem cell research? CHRISTIAN GIRL I said they shouldn't be mixed. God's will still supersedes science. TECH DUDE Okay. This is exactly what I'm talking about. TECH DUDE Whenever scientists don't understand something, they say that they don't understand it. TECH DUDE If they can't produce a working theory, they say, "I don't know." TECH DUDE That's the problem. They should say, "God does it." TECH DUDE Think about it. Whenever science masters something, most religious people give up on it. TECH DUDE So, if we simply replace the concept of "unknown" with "God" then everyone wins. TECH DUDE Whenever we say "God did it", scientists will know that simply means "unknown" and won't get frustrated. TECH DUDE And religious people can't tell the difference anyway. CHRISTIAN GIRL The odds of you getting a blow job tonight just dropped below zero. TECH DUDE Oh, come'on. Don't you have a rational response? CHRISTIAN GIRL What happens when the religious explanations conflict with each other? TECH DUDE That's the entire point of merging religion with science. TECH DUDE All explanations are delegated to science, and all mysteries are delegated to God. It's the perfect compromise. CHRISTIAN GIRL But then, what would be the difference between different religions? TECH DUDE Exactly.